re:stacks

this my excavation and today is Qumran
everything that happens is from now on
this is pouring rain
this is paralyzed

i keep throwing it down two-hundred at a time
it's hard to find it when you knew it
when your money's gone
and you're drunk as hell

on your back with your racks as the stacks as your load
in the back and the racks and the stacks are your load
in the back with your racks and you're un-stacking your load

i've twisting to the sun I needed to replace
the fountain in the front yard is rusted out
all my love was down
in a frozen ground

there's a black crow sitting across from me; his wiry legs are crossed
and he's dangling my keys he even fakes a toss
whatever could it be
that has brought me to this loss?

on your back with your racks as the stacks as your load
in the back and the racks and the stacks of your load
in the back with your racks and you're un-stacking your load

this is not the sound of a new man or crispy realization
it's the sound of the unlocking and the lift away
your love will be
safe with me

not for emma, not forever ago.

go find another lover
to bring a … to string along
with all your lies
you’re still very lovable
i toured the light
so many foreign roads

- bon iver
(thanks for giving me such a good winter)

i'm starting to become more and more convinced that i don't deserve this.
i gave so much. if i wasn't anything, i was a loyal lover.
that's what i am, a lover. i have that capacity, and even after all this heartbreak
i think it still remains. i'm glad that even after you took so much away,
you can't take that away. i'm just relieved. it won't be you.

karma, baby. you get what you give. if you give your most empty, vacant self ; hollow words
thick with idle intoxication...
you'll get it right back.

this is what i will take solace in now.

ongiara

i became awake,
from a very dark place, a patchwork of fear, of poorly conceived ideas.
with a blister of water, the mark of working hands,
ready to catch, or cut.
the senses aligned, the animal urgency, and voices picked up,
flowing over the static, late, quiet.

i became awake.
fingers are open, eyes they are open, the firing of images, an orchestra of scribbles.
the guts of an engine, the veins of a leaf, light onto paper, exposed.
a filament in a bulb, up above or in the ground.
together we are magic, together we are dreaming, together we reach endlessly,
the center of a seed, so full of possibilities.

i became awake.
i thought i was sleeping, but i was only forming
a structure with no ceiling,
with words like a runway, a cloud of a person drifting away.
i was heavy, but now i am light.
i was heavy, but now i am light.

beach baby

when you're out,
tell your lucky one
to know that you'll leave.
don't you lock when you're fleeing
i'd like not to hear keys.

only hold till your coffee warms,
don't hurry or speed.

once a time put a tongue
in your ear on the beach
and you clutch
kicking heels